2) Im sometimes, well, always revered as the coolest that has ever existed.
3) The majority of people outside of the continental U.S. take time everyday around 3:45 (right before daily tea and shag) bow down to a personal shrine of me hidden deep in the depths of their largest closet.
4) Because people have done this for centuries they have known the greatest pleasure to have ever existed. No there is no after life or individual rewards. The pleasure comes from the gift of being able to worship me for a time everyday and sending me large quantities of chocolate.
5) You too can experience this joy. Take a knee. :)